How old were you the last time you felt truly, completely free and comfortable in your skin?
I must have been around 6, running around clumsily on the beach, half naked, not a care in the world. I didn’t compare myself to the other little girls, I didn’t care what I was - or wasn’t - wearing, or if it was hiding my rather round little belly.
It wasn’t that much later in life that I began to wonder why I didn’t look like the girls in magazines or my favorite singers on MTV.
By the age of 15, I started fixating on my seemingly huge hips, and made it a point to keep them covered in “the right” clothing.
From confident and carefree, I suddenly became:
Not thin enough
Not pretty enough
Not “feminine” enough
As women, from a very young age, we’re conditioned to seek an unrealistic ideal of beauty and get raised with a warped view of what it is to be feminine.
All this, at a very sensitive time when we’re only just figuring out our own identity.
We adopt the ideal as our own even though it’s actually been created by a male dominated marketing economy.
Soon enough, we lose access to our inner voice and our own ideals.
And just like that, we have been severed from our natural connection with our body.
Left incomplete, with a profoundly deep wound we carry with us every day as a keepsake.
And thus begins the heartbreaking separation between your body and yourself.
A negative - almost abusive - relationship themed “you’re not good enough”.
And with nowhere to go - being literally attached to you - your body takes the verbal abuse day after day. Chances are, it’s been years.
And if it’s lucky, it stays at verbal abuse. But for many women, the relationship extends to physical abuse in the form of starvation, bingeing, excessive exercise, and a rollercoaster of restrictions.
Effectively, you’ve distanced yourself from your body by completely overriding its unique, individual needs.
I know it’s crazy to think you’ve separated from your own body. After all, you’re in it.
But let me ask you this: What would you do if you were trapped in an abusive relationship with nowhere to go?
Would you respond to every insult, or would you start closing up, shutting down, and maybe, even go numb after a while?
Would you want to do any favors at all for your abusive partner?
This is the very sad state of the relationship between the modern woman and her body.
Over a series of decades, the patriarchal system has made an enemy out of your own body.
And it’s making BANK from it.
The sad truth is, they are monetizing your insecurities.
And they’re pushing “one fits all” formulas onto you.
And chances are, you and your body have both been sick of it for a long time.
As a woman, you’re gifted with heightened intuition.
You know in your gut that you don’t fit one mold.
You know you’re here to embrace your individuality.
You know you were not given this body to bash it.
You know you have your own, unique shade of beauty and that you possess profound gifts to share with the world.
But the devastating reality is that the external voices of the modern world are deafening, pervasive, and near impossible to escape.
And they’ve left you with severe confusion, doubting your own inner truths.
About Your Host, Magda Kay
Growing up, I was conditioned with a very specific definition of what it is to be feminine (something I now know to be completely untrue). In my case, this unfortunately resulted in not feeling completely comfortable and safe around other women. Over the years, I came to realize that when I faced the greatest heartbreaks and challenges of my life, it was always other women who gave me strength. When I was disconnected from my power, it was women who lifted me back up. Through my reconnection to sisterhood, my past wounds started healing very naturally, as I was supported to tap into my feminine power. It’s something I will be eternally grateful for. For this reason, I dedicate a large part of my work to helping women reconnect to their unique power. And as I have experienced firsthand - both through my work and my personal life - the undeniable magic that can take place when a sisterhood comes together, I cannot wait to commence this journey with you.
International Intimacy Expert,
Tantra Teacher & Relationships Coach